People & experiences which were & are truly good, kind, trusting & loving can become misperceived & judged negatively when based in such under examined & accepted negative assumptions.
What is perhaps not recognized is that by treating people with such disrespectful dishonesty, believing & relating to each other negatively based in negative gossip & insincerity, one also adversely effects ones own reputation & trustworthiness as someone who does so.
Especially when by ones own previous admission ones personal experience relating & receiving from someone was enjoyable, kind, nurturing and desired to receive again, but in the face or thought of negatively assumptive, projecting opinion & gossip by others about this person and concern for how one may be viewed socially for associating with this person who has been simply trusting our sincerity, has been kind, honestly communicative & nurturing to us, if one does not have their back, disconnects from them, fails to speak up supportively honestly for them & their integrity, trust and kindness they related & gave to one with, then one becomes a perpetrator of disharmony, of the negative effects of projection & gossip, insincerity and untrustworthiness.
Even as one likely feels disrespected & misunderstood when people assume negatively about, judge, ignore & communicate dishonestly if at all, to oneself.
To blame, view & accuse as the problem those of us who speak up for more mutually honest, trustworthy, inquisitive, lovingly reliable communicating, honoring of agreements & relating, is backward, abusive andncreates needless dissonance, confusion, pain, disharmony and false assumptions personally & collectively.
Which is why I am no longer meekly silent, but speak up affirmatively for myself and all honest, integral, sincere people who genuinely give & relate from mutually respectful honesty & caring love, mean what we say, honor our agreements & trust each other & others to share this basic respect.
Love & integrity involves transparent honest communication, sincerity, follow through with agreements, standing up for people who have been generously kind, nurturing & trusting in sharing themselves and their gifts in trust of mutual respectful support.