" People who make accusations about other peoples supposed hidden, corrupt motives, are actually saying very little about the people they are accusing. But saying a great deal about themselves. Because what those people are saying, those people who spew those kind of accusations, is I cannot believe that anybody would do anything out of a sense of duty, or principle ( or empathy, kindness and love ). They must be doing it for some corrupt reason.
And the reason they think that, is because they themselves never do anything out of conviction, or principle ( or empathy, kindness and loving generosity ). And so they believe that everybody is plagued by the same pathology of soullessness that plagues them. "
This describes many realms of being. Including that of people who choose to misinterpret peoples empathic loving openness to giving nurturing affection. Especially in emotional, sensual and sexual nurturing ways.
Recently I heard someone say how a guy she knew was friendly to her, and how she felt it was pure that he had no interest in her sexually.
On deeper , honest examination, in essence the multi-layered assumptions expressed in such an embodied pleasure negative attitude include :
1) That she fully understood all of his spoken & unspoken feelings, interests & openness.
2) That there is something bad, unkind, worthy of disrespect or inherently selfish about people caring about, feeling attracted to & being open to each other enough to admit their natural, healthy desire for sharing or even simply giving loving appreciative energy through natural emotional, sensual & sexual affection.
3) That ones own enjoyment of talking or in other ways relating with people one finds attractive is not, at least in part, motivated by feelings of pleasure one has related to doing so.
4) That ones own admitted, unadmitted or suppressed enjoyment of & desires for emotional - physical affection with, for or from people who one is open to such with, whether through talking, hugging, cuddling, massages, or sexual relating, is somehow more valid, pure, unselfish or worthy of respect than anyone else s appreciation, honest admission of & desire for or openness to giving, receiving or sharing kind affection in such ways if & as mutually appreciated.
5) And that any one of these various, equally healthy expressions & experiences of kindly affirming, nurturing & wellness supporting pleasures are more or less valid or loving.
In truth they are all equally healthy, vital, kind and natural.
Some people unfortunately are blinded by normalized cultural & personal inhibitions, fears, insecurities and other negative projections to the point that they view with suspicion & lack of appreciation, their own or others genuinely kind feelings & openness to give or share nurturing, loving affection with people if and as may exist a mutual openness to. An openness which some healthy, appreciative people are very welcoming & appreciative of, and experience as deeply loving, nurturing and generous.
I have experienced this in both professional and personal contexts. And see it in how other people interpret & relate with each other.
How the same offer and way of giving which I, or another person, may be open to providing at times out of genuinely kind, loving intentions to be another channel of loving vitality, appreciation & life affirming affectionate energy for specific people if and as learned to be mutually resonant, is interpreted by some people with deep gratitude, appreciation and experienced by them as beautifully supportive, nurturing and loving.
While some other people misinterpret the same offer or experience, and people open to them, through lenses of suspicion, fear, distrust and other negative beliefs.
For instance I generally am naturally very fulfilled by and enjoy purely giving to mutually compatible people through professional massages.
As well as by "just" giving nurturing pleasure for mutually compatible, appreciatively open women in purely personal contexts through non-paid, more intimately affectionate, 2-6 hour massages based in my Taoist sexual meditative experience similar to tantric arts. Some people on hearing that have been doubtful or even suspicious that anyone would enjoy just giving, especially in more intimate contexts.
Yet for me giving in such focused ways & contexts is another natural & beautiful way of cultivating being meditatively centered and deeply attuned to embodying cosmic & personal Love, empathy & vital energy within myself. And of feeling, expanding and flowing these blissful nurturing energies into the person appreciatively receiving through & from me in kind support of their enjoyment & wellness nourishing pleasure.
In this way I am receiving in one sense from source energy and my own on-going refinement of embodied meditative focus. And in another sense relationally by feeling the genuinely appreciative and harmonizing yin receptivity to my loving yang nurturing energy, of the woman enjoyably receiving through & from me.
This is a natural aspect of yin-yang harmony of Life expressing & enriching itself through us as human beings, in my feeling. We are in this sense a fleshing embodying of the tai chi, yin - yang complimentary & mutually nourishing energies. Which is an art and fulfillment in itself.
When we honestly examine, release & transform our multilayered, personally & culturally acquired fears, suspicions, shame and under-appreciation of emotionally & physically embodied pleasures of all kinds, we heal and expand our capacity for being, giving & receiving Love.
Evolution is in part a gradual development of increasing our openness and capacity for feeling and sharing pleasure. Pleasure freed of negative judgements, fear, suspicion, unappreciation, guilt & shame, is a feedback from Life that what we are doing is good, loving and health affirming.
Pleasure feels good when freed of such judgements, because it is natural, loving, life affirming & good.
We then more fully open our embodying mind & heart to perceive & benefit from the natural goodness, purity, love & healthfulness of our own, and equally of each others, desires for and enjoyment of diverse feelings of embodied & relational pleasure.
Allowing expansion of loving feelings & sensitivity to exist, grow and flow life affirming, healing & nurturing energies honestly & fully within & through our own, and each others as mutually open, embodying consciousness.